The Theory of Nice.

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Nice, Niceties and Notorious

Nice:  A generic word often used to describe an average situation, person or place in life.  Nice is not amazing nor is it terrible. It is a base line which we all walk on.  It is also used when all other positive or negative words fail to describe a person, event, place.  Eg. We had a crap time… would be replaced with nice as not to offend the people you hung out with.

To further explain the Theory of Nice in a geographic sense I have provided you with examples based on a holiday home. We replaced the real feelings of people with the word NICE and the list is a brief summary of what this statement could possibly mean.

It was nice.  (The holiday home)

  1. It was old and decrepit house but the owners are really proud of it and allowed us to stay there for free.
  2. It was average and there was nothing to do and they didn’t even have Foxtell.
  3. There was only cheap instant coffee there wasn’t even a pod machine so our weekend was ruined because of this but if we admit this we would look shallow
  4. It was nice: I can’t remember as I was drunk most of the time and are not even sure where I slept or who with.
  5. It was nice: It was freaking awesome.  spa, pool, basketball court, butler… we don’t want to give too much away or give it a great review because they may put up the prices if it becomes too popular and you might book in on the same weekend as us and then we’ll have to wait.

When talking about people here are some examples of what nice may mean.

She is nice. (or he)  can translate into:

  1. She’s an absolute bitch. She is nasty and I’m not saying anything more in case it gets back to her and she hunts me down and tries to cause turbulence in my life. I will do everything to avoid her.
  2. She is so boring and I wanted to blow my brains out.
  3. She is is another world, another life, another timezone to me and although she is ‘nice’ I just don’t understand her and never will. It’s best to part ways now.
  4. I can’t remember her name and am not even sure who you are talking about.
  5. She is beyond nice.  She is perfect and stunning and gorgeous and I want to marry her and become a lesbian because of her.  I don’t want you meeting her because she will make me look below average and she might choose to be your BFF and all the ground work I have done so far will be disregarded.

The Theory of Nice.

If you hadn’t noticed the Temple catchphrase is to “Just Be Freaking Nice OK!!”   We stand by this statement but wanted to expand on it.

To assist you I have provided you with a basic chart to assist you in understanding my theory.


I’m happy living a nice life but if it was nice all the way I don’t believe I would be fulfilled.

Nice is safe and an OK place to be.  To aim for ‘just nice’ in your own life however for me,  isn’t enough.

On the left you will see the bare minimum I believe you should aim for when it comes to your own life.  Lots of nice moments but there has to be passion, fulfilment, dreams and there should be lots of freaking amazing moments.

By saying I’m happy living a nice life you are saying, I am happy living a neither extraordinary life nor one that involves too many deep emotions. I sit safely in the middle unnoticed and untouched by anything that great or that risky.

It is actually OK to stay on the nice area, as long as there is the appreciation to a nice life.

Now on the right is where our slogan: Just be Freaking Nice. OK!! originates from. We believe that if is not in your nature to be an inspiration or provide motivation to others, the bare minimum you should be is nice.

If you can’t support people, treat them with respect or be honest with them at least be nice.

Don’t ever allow a situation or person to bring out traits in  the area below nice.  While others may be rude, inconsiderate, jealous or plot revenge, they are missing out on the simplicity and rewards of being nice.

There.  It is as simple as that and this is written proof of why I failed psychology. I have no interest in actual studies in the area, I believe I am right through my own thoughts on the basic requirements of nice.

So if someone pushes in front of you at the supermarket, tell them that it is rude. If they then spit in your face and call you an old cow you can either look at them and feel pity that they obviously lead a very sad, twisted life and the evidence is there that they are not nice.

If you say however: Hey you feral rude freak. Wait your turn.  Don’t push in front of me or I will put a curse on you to be charged double for that chicken you’re scanning. Expect a more verbal, possibly violent reaction from them.

Why not try: Did you want to go first? I don’t mind. In a genuine tone and they may be left confused to if they were displaying their normal behavior or if it was your idea for them to go first.

Oh it’s getting too complex now.

Just be nice freaking nice OK!! We may change the world slowly by displaying good manners despite those who are not nice.

But make your own life awesome.

Peace and  OMmmmni…


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Supermodel of the Mundane: Tamzen

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The Temple: Fashion Supermodel

There is only one model that captures the essence of gingham. Only the original supermodel Tamzen Temple can wear such a crap fabric and turn it half good.

G. Armani 2015

FullSizeRender (15)

 As many of you know I was a former supermodel and that after the pumpkin shoot my modelling career came to an end.

Well exciting things have been happening lately as I have been in and out of jobs and once again my former peers are calling me a supermodel.

I was approached by the Generic Elastic Hair Company to model their latest hair tie.  The brief was tough.  They wanted it to scream fashion and on trend.  I knew I could do it and had my poses planned long before the actual shoot.

As usual I was amazing and captured the look.

I alone managed to embody the pure necessity of a hair-tie conveniently worn by millions of women around their wrist ‘just in case.’

Supermodel Tamzen Temple

The campaign was a success and since then I have been hot property in the Mundane Modelling Industry.

Other supermodels won’t go there but I carved a niche for myself with designers embracing my talent for making mundane fashion items look extraordinary.

The picture below is one taken through the winter season to promote tissues of course.

Where there is a stigma of germs and snot, I manage to make the humble tissue a fashion must have and many women begged to be coughed on by those with festy flus to try to get the smoking dazey look I created.


Supermodel Tamzen Temple


A friend of mine named Gucci Mustav, who happens to be a top designer in Paris, had a baby about eight months ago.

Oh she is amazing and has designed couture gowns for royalty.
Now for anyone with a new baby you will know that the lack of sleep can make you delirious and I fear this is what happened.

She wanted to make a difference to the lives of mothers everywhere and make multipurpose fashion wear.  She had good intentions and being a compassionate supermodel,  I went along and donated my time to model her Tea Towel Scarf.  She thought it would be great for mums worldwide to own one and was near failure until I showed the world just how to wear it with my blue steel looks..


Supermodel Tamzen Temple

It was a hit and the millionaires who knew nothing about tea towels scooped them up at $2000 a piece.

The hype died down as did her clothes dryer,  as did her housekeeper. All dead in the same week, she had to actually hang her own clothes on the line and found herself with pegs attached to her clothes for easy reach when the Peg Princess Range was launched.

Supermodel Tamzen Temple


Once again her critics laughed at the idea. Once again I saved the day by using my stunning looks, heaps of filters and photo editing to make the mundane amazing.

Supermodel Tamzen Temple

I did glamour, royalty, rock chick and even boho.   They have been flying off the shelf and I am now near booked for the rest of the year with famous and emerging designers knowing I the most must have item in mundane fashion.

I’ll end with a quote from Veri Wang.  She was desperate for a model, I was there…..

Ms Temple is like a cheap wine.  She may not get better with age but is great alternative when the house is dry.


I’ll drink to that.

Peace and Ommm from the Temple.

See my latest mundane modelling assignment for Chux 

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This is a minterview format.

Quotes from the Anti-Quoter.

Quotes Are Made of Words…

(Tamzen Temple 2015)

So if you know me you would know that the whole quote thingy fascinates me, intrigues me, makes me laugh, makes me confused and makes me wonder about people I thought I knew when I see the random quotes they post that reveal an ignorance or an unsavory element to their personality.

(You would also know I love long sentences)

There was once upon a time when quotes were left for those who made their mark on the world.  Presidents, philosophers, scholars and pioneers.  We would relate the quote to great battles of the past, to signify a moment of hardship, to the struggles of nation,  a discovery that would change the world or a pivotal  moment in history.  There would be a discourse surrounding these quotes that entrenched them further into a generation and created a united feeling

  • Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.

Winston Churchill (a while back about something)

They would connect us and inspire us together as a group, a family, a country.  Taken from a speech or just snapped in the moment.

These short sentences or few words become an anchor for a nation and bound the belief system at the time.  Of course not everyone was in sync when it comes to any political party  but they could no doubt deny the power of the quote of that particular moment and the significance it held.


   “Ask not what what your country can do for you,: ask what you can do for your country.”

JFK (a few decades ago)


    “One small step for man, one giant leap for mankind.”

Neil Armstrong (doing the moonwalk) 


     “I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character.”

Martin Luther King JNR (Washington in the 1960s)


Some made us think and bring warm fuzzy feelings..

      “Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened.”


      “Fun is good.”

Both by Dr Seuss 


Now I have to reveal that for some reason there is no better quote for me, no more meaningful one than a Chinese one.  I think it’s the whole wisdom of Confucius as he was so the original quoter…

      “Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.”

Confucius (a very long, long, long time ago) 

Hang on…. WTF does that even mean?  There must be more to that quote that I’m not seeing.  I’m confucioused…. I’m sure I’ve seen better ones from him in fortune cookies… Anywho…


There is the journey quote.

       “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.”

Lao Tzu  (about mid goatee growth)


This is true Mr Tzu, but a journey to the fridge for champagne begins with a single step or me yelling to Micko the Guru to “pour me one.”

Although in my younger years after a wild night, the front door from the taxi seemed like a journey of a thousand steps, and rolls…  Maybe if quotes are ancient we can tear them apart easier.

(No disrespect to any of the above quoters as they are all awesomely amazing)

Anything anyone says can be a quote but there are some that will never be printed with a backdrop of a lush rain forest, a rainbow or blue sky and posted on Instagram.

They provide no real level of intelligence or compassion and don’t give hope for the future generation or any solution.  They are just stupid ridiculous words and will only be remembered with a distaste and sadness.

 “Jesus didn’t say yes to everyone. I mean Jesus knew that there was a place for everything and it is not necessarily everyone’s place to come to Australia.”

Tony Abbott (Possibly drunk, comparing his choices as Jesus like and giving Jesus a unwarranted bad name)


Hey but why do I only have men….?

      “Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.”

Maya Angelou  (who cares when she said this, she was just  freaking awesome woman) 


Or this saint.

      “I know God will not give me anything I can’t handle. I just wish that He didn’t trust me so much.”

 Mother Teresa (oh bless her selfless soul)


It appears to me that although there are modern quotes none of them meet the absolute intent of those who have lived in the history they were created in.

I often see quotes of long ago sprawled on brick walls in graffiti style but many don’t even know the origins of them.  What has happened to giving credit to the quoter?  People occasionally post quotes on the back of toilet doors but do so without the any knowledge of what the words really mean.  Quotes change in this ‘new’ context that may be far away of the heart and soul of their creator.

Those who share these quotes without the intent behind them share them only with the emotion they may be feeling at the time.  All they  know is it resonates with them in that particular moment so they share this connection they feel from it in anyway they can.  A tattoo, in a diary, in a text, on Instagram, Facebook and it may be paired with an irrelevant picture, have bad spelling and have a fancy font to make it more appealing to repin…..

With social media,  quotes are becoming a festy infection that have made the great words of yesteryear invalid, forgotten.  Like hairspray and perms of the 80’s they are oversprayed and each end up looking much the same. They are mostly one dimensional and don’t really mark a moment in history but a segment of the the week or coffee craving.  A quick quote fix to get through the day.

The ‘I survived’ quote makes me cringe the most….

   “I was belted as a child and now I have respect.”


“Karma will get those who f*&% me over and from the crap they gave me I am stronger.”

Here’s a quote from me.. “Wadda? Why? Please seek counselling or talk to a friend or me rather than quoting your obvious pain..

They haven’t moved on from the past they are either crying out for help or hoping the person who hurt them will see it but this is probably unlikely as surely they aren’t on their friend list……

No longer left for great figures to inspire, quotes are……  I use the cliche… created by every man and his dog.   Actually there are probably dog quotes.. hang on a sec and I’ll find you one..


OK I just made that one up.. with the whole Depp Australian Saga.….

Quotes have become instructional, they can describe personalities and unrealistic hopes for the future…

They are often just statements like:

     “Act like a boss….”


     “I need coffee and a billion dollars..”

Well that one could be true…  Both by Anon… who is this Anon dude?   He or she have created a billion quotes and have a whole a lot to answer for and why do so many forget to reference a world leader but add the Anon tag of a non person who was probably some drunk guy at the local pub who forgot his own name?

This whole craziness to quotes have lead me to become an anti-quoter…


If you liked that one you should join me at Instagram where I am freaking hilarious… type in the hashtag…..

#templeunspirationalquotes to see all my brilliant totally rolling in laughter, one day hystorical words….



I could not let this whole post go on without directing you to Part Two of the Quote Series from The Temple.

Here’s a review:  “Possibly one of the funniest things I have ever watched.  This Tamzen Temple is an undiscovered superstar who is a genius with her exploration of the impact of social media in society.”  Norman Hale.  Founder of  Binipula (The latest social media sharing concept)

Oh just watch it and if you have problems viewing the video just go to the original Temple TV (youtube) to watch. It will be on Facebook this week so go and  tag an overquoter…… or you can share direct through the icons below.

I’m sure your grandchildren will regram my work one day but in the meantime I will leave you with this…


“Life is either a daring adventure or nothing”

– Helen Keller (1800’s & no words could give this woman justice to her brilliance)

What’s your favorite quote?  Are you a quoter? Does my hair look messy in the video?? Do you think I should have chicken or steak tonight..? I’d love you to tell me all these things so scroll scroll down to let me know.

Peace and Ommm from the Temple.


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Where is Tamzen’s Temple?

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The Temple Location

Just hold on everyone.

Every day I receive emails from my lovely readers asking me the following.

Tamzen Temple, where is the Temple?

Tamzen Temple, why can’t we find you in the Yellow Pages or on Google Maps?  We really want to visit the Temple.

Tamzen Temple can we donate 5 billion dollars to the Temple?

Let me answer all, with the third question first. No you can’t donate money, we don’t want yours or any one else’s money Richard Branson, so stop offering it.   We don’t want it and we don’t need it.  The Temple is about what we have and I am already rich in so many ways.

Now, where is the Temple?  If you are reading this you are already here.  The Temple exists in front of your eyes with what you are reading now, you are in my Temple, my world reading all the things that are important to me.

The Guru, my gorgeous little Lebron and my stepson Jordan are the most important things that matter to me. Writing brings me extra fulfillment and the friends and family I have are all I need to flourish.  If you look around where you are sitting right now, that is your Temple.

You see we believe that every home, whether it be a tinshack, castle, tent, combi van, mansion, cubby house or just like my place a humble home with peeling paint and a creaky door is a Temple. The message of the Temple is that whatever you have in your heart be it your home, your family and friends is where or what your Temple is.

You are all Temple Queens and the men are all Gurus. We should value, with all our thankful belief in,  what we have. We can thank whatever Lord, God, Buddah or just the knowing of a higher being if that is what you believe or just count our blessings or luck if you are not spiritual or religious. Welcome others into your Temple to enrich your own life and to add to theirs. Be honest and true and just be nice OK!!


We at the Temple just want all others to join us in mind to love life and all they have. It’s as simple as that and shouldn’t be complicated.

We’ll bring you later a few mantras we live by, basically they are common sense and courtesy but we will share more soon.

So if you want to donate to the Temple, put your phones down, switch the TV off and donate the time and love to those closest to you in your own Temple.

Ommmm and peace and lots of love from the ME.

If you want to join the us go and enter your email address to help us spread the message.

Xoxox Tam

Below is a quote from the Dalai Lama and I suppose once I found this I realized that we are living within his philosophy here at the Temple and too me it is as simple as that.

This is my simple religion.

There is no need for temples;
no need for complicated philosophies.
Our own brain, our own heart is our temple;
the philosophy is kindness
– Dalai Lama

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The Temple Tribe: Join Us Today.

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Have you joined the Temple Tribe?

If you are reading this, you are nearly there but we want you to join so you don’t miss out on the Temple Times.

Once a month or two or three…. the team at the Temple send out our newsletter and we’re a little worried as we are self hosted that some of our followers and some of our visitors are missing out.

To receive the your free copy of the Temple Times it’s as easy as this.

If you missed entering your email in the pop up check out the sidebar menu where we, compliment you…. (You’re adorable, come join us) find the compliment and then enter your email….

Then go check your email and for some insane reason it could be in your junk/spam file.

Confirm subscription (check as not junk/spam) and Taadaaa.

You are officially the coolest person in the world and now part of the Temple Tribe.

Now.. I have a confession. I am seriously addicted to Instagram… Yes I know it detracts from my blogging but ohhh what fun and it’s a snapshot of what goes on at the Temple and in my head.

Click on the pic below to see what other crazy pics I post.




If you would like to link up on Gplus here’s you can do so right HERE

If you’re looking for us just type in Tamzen Temple.  We’re everywhere.  I’m actually like a disease of the good kind where you hold your belly in laughter and scratch your head wondering what the hell is that chic talking about.

The Temple’s message is this simple:  We are trying to bring back manners, commonsense and decency through minterviewing celebrities and innate objects.

If you’re looking for the Temple on your GPS don’t. The address and everything else you need to know about the Temple and our Tribe is right HERE

So go subscribe for our Temple News, follow us if you want on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter and through the telepathic thoughts we send out and just be nice OK!!

Peace and Ommmm from Tamzen and all the Temple Team. xxxx

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Pumpkin Model Extraordinaire

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As you may know from the ABOUT ME section,  I was a child star with a challenging start to life.  What you may not know is that a long while  back in my early twenties, I was a model.  As I am  a little short I didn’t make it to the catwalk but still starred in many campaigns. As I got older my looks dwindled, no one wanted the ‘old girl’ and ‘her’ wrinkles anymore.

I was destitute having spent all my modelling money prior to bribing doctors to surgically lengthen my legs, trying to perfect the right shade of copper hair and a personal, on call manicurist.  I thought it was over, until I got a call.  A huge campaign launching Halloween in Australia.

A sexy cat I thought, I would do that great, or a hot witch rocking a skimpy leather outfit.  I turned up ready for anything, ecstatic they were happy enough with my portfolio to choose me….

I felt quiet smug, I must say, as a model left the studio in tears.  Obviously because they had pushed her aside for muwah, Tamzen Temple, short in stature but a supermodel nonetheless.

I put on a one piece black bather like thing and deathly heels with spikes.  My style, I thought, wild and crazy.  All I needed was some little cat ears and I would look the spunkiest Halloween cat ever.

Deep in my thoughts of grandeur a voice snapped me back to reality.

“Here, put this on and release your inner pumpkin.”  The wardrobe assistant handed me a pumpkin helmet.

“I’m not wearing this. I’m Tamzen Temple, the amazingly talented model.”

“Yeah and I’m Coco Chanel, do it or leave like the others.”

I held it in my hands and stared in the mirror asking myself, how did I get to this point?  I decided I could leave then with no payment or be the best darn pumpkin I could be.  I ate pumpkin pie, oh I mean humble pie and took it as a sign from the universe to put things in perspective.  The day before, there was no way I could even afford to eat pumpkin. Now I was one.

The photographer snapped away and I gave it my all, crazy pumpkin, sexy pumpkin, angry pumpkin, blue steel pumpkin.  I used all my past modelling experience to capture the essence of what a Halloween pumpkin was.  I was on fire.

The campaign was a massive success and I still get royalties to this day and we at the Temple laugh and refer to those cheques as my ‘pumpkin money’.

While looks may fade pumpkin will always taste delicious in soups, roasted, in a pie and even scones.

What I have learned from this is I don’t really care about getting older, in fact I am honored. My pear figure is what it is, my carrot hair has a few greys and my almond eyes will be surrounded by alfalfa wrinkles.   I don’t have to go through all the comp the young ones do, like the pumpkin shaded fake tan, trying to be a butternut and not Just Another Pumpkin. I am comfortable being a wrinkly 43 year old vintage pumpkin.

What’s your favorite vegetable and why. I’d love to know. Scroll, scroll down to leave your comments.

Have you subscribed yet??? Just enter your email in the subscription box and confirm to receive the latest Temple Updates.

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This was a Minterview

Is there such a thing as too much Tamzen Temple??

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We’re putting it out there…..

Can you have too much of Tamzen Temple???..

Personally I don’t think so. I’m endearing and who wouldn’t want more of me?

I’m kidding OK..Well I’m a little bit serious about the issue as we’re looking into the future. Maybe a few months ahead, maybe a bit more.

We’re a little stuck though as Temple TV already exists. (Some uni in Philly already has it)  So we can’t move forward until we think of another original  name that will capture the pure excitement and drama we will bring to the screen. (Youtube channel that is)

We are asking you: the people of Templetown, what can we call this new project that doesn’t exist yet but is certain to be a hit?

We await your response.. Until then stay tuned and don’t change the channel.

Ommmm and Peace from the Temple

xx Tam

Scroll, scroll to the bottom to leave your brilliant suggestions.

The Temple Youtube channel is HERE….

For disclaimer and copyright information click HERE

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Kim Kardashian asks Tamzen Temple: “Does my butt look big in this?”

I answered “Of course it does, you have a big butt, that’s part of who you are, embrace it.”

“True, true she replied.”

“How about our new look here at the Temple?” I asked her back.

“Oh I hadn’t even noticed.”  She answered. (Selfish b#$@:  Oh forgive me Temple for saying that)

She is seriously so wrapped up in her own world she forgot to check it out.  I mean just because we were absent a few days shouldn’t mean she should forget us.  So we’re informing you all:  we had a bit of a makeover in the last few days with a few more adjustments to come which is why we’ve been a bit quiet but would love to know what do you think?

Once it’s all complete, we’ll keep you informed of the latest news as seen by Tamzen Temple, reviews, info on a range of subjects, a photo gallery and serve you up a variety of contributors whose enormous talent  will make Kim Kardashian’s butt look minute.

Peace and no buts. Xoxo Omm from the Temple.

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This was a Minterview

If you would like to see my latest with George Clooney click here.

Image source is:  Kalumba2009

Interview with Thyself: The Coolest Person I Know

TZ : Hey Tamzen, you’re looking fabulous.

Tamzen: Why thanks, I washed my hair.

TZ:  Oh is that a big deal?

Tamzen:  Hell yeah!  Don’t you know after having a child that you may not even get to brush your teeth until Wednesday.

TZ:  Shhh, you’re scaring all the would be mothers.

Tamzen:  You know what?   I don’t care.  Seriously my friend Penny said if the truth about motherhood was revealed we would never reproduce.  I’m here to change that.

TZ: What, to stop people reproducing?

Tamzen: No you idiot, to inform them of the truth.  Childbirth hurts you know, I mean it freaking hurts lots.

TZ:  I think everyone knows that.

Tamzen: Well yeah, maybe that truth has been exposed but what about the stitches.

TZ: Oh, um I don’t wanna know about that.

Tamzen: That’s my point, I didn’t know.

TZ:  So are you saying you wouldn’t have done it had you known.

Tamzen: No of course I would but…..

TZ: But what?

Tamzen:  Ahhh, seriously, I think I’m gunna have to rethink my approach to the info I’m sharing. Right, here’s the plan, we’ll start off small but we’ll add as we go from a lifestyle to parenting section and even reviews on products, movies and more.  I think we’re going to need help and find a few contributors, experts in their field.

TZ:  Sounds exciting.  I’m in.  Can you tell us, how did you come up with the name, Tamzen Temple?

Tamzen:  Well Micko, my incredibly handsome partner calls me Tamzen.

TZ: Is that not your real name?

Tamzen:  No it’s actually Tamara but he called me that when we first met and now all his network think that’s my name.  I don’t mind.

TZ:  What about the Temple part?

Tamzen:  Ah, well if you notice, Tamzen has ZEN in it.  So Temple followed naturally.   I love the whole Temple part as I want here not to just be a webpage or blog but a place for people to come and enjoy and share the absurdities and tranquillity of life.

TZ: Wow, a place not just a website. You are genius!

Tamzen:  So it’s all about the Temple and we’re wanting to encourage all women to be the Temple Queens they were destined to be, and the men to be Gurus and the children gifts from the Temple Gods.

TZ: Sounds interesting.

Tamzen:  I know.. With the big plans and changes happening  for the site you’ll have to make sure you pop in often and press follow so you don’t miss out.

TZ: Already have.

Tamzen:  Great and I appreciate you all.   Ommmm and peace from the Temple.

TZ:  You do realise you’re not really in a Temple or a Temple Queen?

Tamzen: It’s a virtual world TZ, I can be whoever I want.  You may exit. Ommmm from the Temple.

The End.


Image Although I love chatting to myself (come on we all do it)  I’m rather glad and very blessed that I have these two to keep me company. xo   (C) T Zito 2014.


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All About Me: Tamzen Temple

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Welcome to the Temple,

I was born in the US in an incredible story that began a trail of misfortune.  A nurse intern, who was more focused on the hot doctor than filling out forms correctly, put the wrong tag on my ankle and I was sent home or at least on the road in a caravan with a couple called Jack and Shirley.

They would travel from town to town performing a duet show at local cowboy bars.  I’d be shoved in a box behind the bar for the show and for this I became a placid baby as no one could hear my cries over the barfights and screeching sound of Shirley’s yodels.

It was at one of these bars when I was three, as I stood near the guitar case dressed in my rodeo outfit  collecting tips, that a talent agent spotted me.  My prayers were answered because we were out of the bars and into studios with me starring in commercials advertising everything from toothpaste to life insurance.  Shirley and Jack bought a house and for the first time we were a real family.

It was the happiest two years of my life before Shirley died of eye shadow poisoning; the blue shimmering  kind had metallics in it that were meant for street cars not skin.  Jack and I were devastated until a hooker like woman called Marlene came along to ease his pain.

The joy was short lived as it turned out ….. click below to read more.

All About Me..




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