The Paleo Notwithit Way.
With all the fuss over that Paleo cookbook Bubba Yum Yum.. I thought it was my duty to see why Pan Macmillan backed off from publishing it, only for author, celebrity chef Pete Evans to release it himself digitally.
Sure a few recipes for kids and bubs the Paleo way gives parents an option for an alternative but the concern was that the bone broth formula “could cause “permanent damage” or kill infants due to its high salt and Vitamin A content.”
So I interviewed Paleo himself….
Here’s a transcript of the interview.
Tamzen Temple: Great to meet you Mr Paul Leo.
Paleo: It’s Paleo. Not Paul… Leo..
Tamzen Temple: Is that like Madonna, like one name?
Paleo: No not like her… well yes it is just one word but she does the macrobiotic diet and I’m nothing like that.
Tamzen Temple: What’s a macrobiotic diet?
Paleo: It’s a lot of Japanese type food. Seaweed, miso soup, brown rice.
Tamzen Temple: Hey I wonder…. were there Japanese cavemen?
Paleo: Most probably.
Tamzen Temple: So I suppose a Palaeolithic diet would vary depending where you lived. Like if you had a cave near the beach and saw some seaweed, you might just munch on that.
Paleo: Are you really that ridiculous?
Tamzen Temple: How so?
Paleo: I am based on what people ate during the Palaeolithic times. Now that mainly consists of lean meats, nuts and berries.
Tamzen Temple: Yes I have Wikied you and know what you’re about. My main concern is those on it now; those caught up in another diet fad, just don’t get that people of that time only lived an average age of 35 years… Is that because of the diet or did the dinosaurs eat them?
Paleo: Next question please.. and make it slightly intelligent please. This is a very serious issue at the moment with the whole Pete Evans cookbook deal gone sour.
Tamzen Temple: Yeahhhhh.. You know he could’ve saved himself a whole lot of trouble if he didn’t involve the DIY of baby formula with liver and bone broth…. I have heard that breast is best… I reckon even the cavemen would agree with that…
Paleo: Yes and I’m sure they would but this is an alternative formula for the little ones.
Tamzen Temple: Yeah right, sure, whatever… Now my friend Marlon is a time traveller and he went back to the dinosaur age time specifically for me and he has photographic proof that very few people back then had blue eyes and none had the crystal clear piercing blue eyes of Pete Evans which draw me to only one conclusion.
Paleo: And what would that stupid conclusion be?
Tamzen Temple: Aliens…. If you think about it aliens have big sky eyes… they are almost flawless in their complexion.. Like Pete, they are slightly rigid in their movements and … sky blue eyes… all that hovering in the atmosphere…
Paleo: If I had have known you were this brainless I would never have agreed to this interview.
Tamzen Temple: Ummm some may say brainless but many say brilliant in exposing the truth.
Paleo: Just get on with it.. You have five minutes of my time left.
Tamzen Temple: Oh and that Atkins… I mean I’m part Italian so I actually have spaghetti veins with rich, red wine saucy blood flowing through … Atkins is not an option for me because I seriously need carbs and geezzz.. Look at Sophia Loren.. If that is what a good spag bol does then I’m on it every day of the week. Actually I would not be surprised if she drank olive oil in a champagne glass.. I mean that skin… that flawless complexion… I am so starting that Mediterranean diet…
Paleo: Yes she is gorgeous. All I know though is that fur and fire seems to be the key.. It is instinct for us to be like cavemen. To hunt and gather and all was ruined once farmed animals and processed foods came about.
Tamzen Temple: It does make me wonder, based your whole diet, why did God or the aliens give us cows because correct me if I’m wrong, dairy is on the outer with you. Maybe the cows are here for a greater purpose…. It really makes you think about the creation of life, doesn’t it?
Paleo: I’d rather not think about anything you have said Tamzen Temple….
So that was it. Paul Leo, or Paleo as I came to know him left as quick as he entered. Like a fad for the moment that will return, he walked straight out of the Temple rambling about finding firewood and skinning a cow for his winter coat.
Oh just eat and diet as you want. Finding a diet that suits you is great and if the Paleo way is it, that’s awesome. I just find it incredibly disturbing that the cookbook in question is willing to take risks with a child/baby’s health with DIY mulched up liver made formula.
Allow them to eat a balanced diet and like any extreme religion, diet or cause…do what you want, follow whatever God or alien you please but if it’s extreme or a cult, leave the kids out of it.
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Peace and Ommmm from the Temple.
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